Got Chance

14 tips how to become the next john chow

14 TIPS – How To Become The Next John Chow ?

John Chow If you are a blogger, I bet you’ve heard about John Chow who makes more than $30,000 from his blog alone every month. He is a inspiration for many bloggers, including me. So, are you wondering how you can become then next John Chow ? Here’s how :

  1. Name your child the unconventional way. Register the name‘s domain name before naming your kid.
  2. Go grab a good digital camera. Take HQ snaps of whatever you eat and post them on your blog regularly.
  3. Love Cars. Write about them. Post pictures of them. Have one in your header if possible.
  4. 7 out of your ever 10 posts should be from ReviewMe, STRICTLY.
  5. After all, your blog should be a make money online blog.
  6. But, make only one post on making money online. Make all the others OFF-TOPIC.
  7. You should dump your blog will all kinds of ads under the earth : Peel away ads, Stripe ads, 468×60 banner, 300×250 banner and what not.
  8. Place a bunch of completely irrelevant links on your sidebar courtesy of Text-Link-Ads.
  9. Get slapped by Google, banned by Digg and kicked out by Technorati.
  10. Google Adwords is for advertising. But, you are John Chow. So, use it for sending IMs to other bloggers.
  11. Be an evil Panda killer.
  12. Eat Evil, Sleep Evil, Think Evil and be the Root of all Evil.
  13. To become the next John Chow, you must first kill the existing John Chow. Yeah, the Nike-way, just do it.
  14. Last but not the least, if possible, change your name to John Chow. You can still top Google for that name.

Note : This post was not written with the motive of hurting/insulting John or any of his great fans. After all, I am also one.

23 Responses

Thanks for the funny update. Amazing how people just don’t change for the better. Always greedy and milk everything for what it’s worth.

LOL, I love the article! You are absolutely right… 100%.

Wow, i was relieved when i first started reading the post. That headline scared me a little. I thought to myself, who could ever want to be like him? I know he has made some good posts, but honestly, he has taken it too far, too many people trying to copy, and his blog really has just lost it.

Thanks for humoring me though 🙂

~ Flyer

This was perhaps my first go at humor. Glad you like it 🙂

Thanks for the comments..

Hilarious! I had to read the second one a couple times before I realized where you were going with this.

That is very funny! I don’t read his blog very often because of number 6… so I didn’t know all of those things about John Chow.

Really thanks for the nice comments guys 🙂

You put the post in a nice hilarious way. But you have to give due credit to John Chow too. He is not all what is depicted in this post.

It was very nice of you to include the disclaimer in the end requesting that this article be taken in a humorous manner.

Absolutely Richael.. John is simple amazing.. 42,000 RSS Readers and 3000 Twitter followers is not an easy task..

Nice post, i want be like John Chow.

Please write again about John Chow

thank you

hahahah! nice! I especially loved the 7 out of 10 review me posts… it’s so true though.

🙂 Glad that you like it Tom..

You missed one: Having a poker (horse) face like John Chow is the key of his success. :p

I laughed all the way. It is a difficult task to write something humorous abot JC since a lot has been already said, but you managed to obtain a funny and original piece.

John chow is a successful blogger, but due to its highly involvement in link sales he was punished by Google recently

Yes Chetan.. You are right..

That’s hilarious. Poor johnchow…

Rew

Ironically it seems John Chow is the opposite of John Doe… xD

Haha this is funny, yeah poor John Chow

This was great! hahahaha… everyone takes the ‘game’ so serious it was nice to read something that had some humor about it… and I LOVED the super-small print disclaimer at the bottom!! I didn’t see it at first and almost needed a magnifying glass to read it – but it was a brilliant touch.

@RealWorldAffiliate.

Thanks, instead of magnifying glass, a simple “Ctrl + +” combo would’ve helped 😛

Maybe im the next john chow hehe…